Myth #13: Creating Boundaries Now Will Help Me Protect Myself Later

Let's jump into a sneaky little myth that masquerades as wisdom:

“Creating boundaries now will help me protect myself.”

Now listen, boundaries are biblical. Boundaries are healthy. But when they’re rooted in fear- not freedom- they can actually become barriers to growth, connection, and obedience.

Where This Myth Shows Up

This usually sounds like:

“I’m just being wise about my time.”

“I don’t want to be taken advantage of.”

“I’m going to protect myself from burnout from the get-go.”

“I don’t want too many clients so I will limit my schedule.”

On the surface, it sounds smart. But dig deeper, and often what’s happening is this:

Coaches start setting up rules, limits, and preemptive barriers for things that haven’t even happened.

Not out of lived experience… but out of fear.

Fear of being misunderstood. Fear of not having control. Fear of being drained, used, or rejected.

Boundaries can block instead of guard.

A couple of years ago, I had a session with a new coach who told me she’d already decided she won’t coach more than three people a month and was not going to be available in evenings.

But she hadn’t coached anyone yet.

What was really happening?

She was building fences around things that hadn’t even entered her field, trying to avoid pain she hadn't actually encountered.

And here’s the thing- God doesn’t call us to shrink back. Isaiah 54:2 says, “Enlarge the place of your tent, stretch your tent curtains wide, do not hold back. ”That’s an invitation to expand, not contract. To make room. To create space. To welcome people in.

But when we preemptively build boundaries around what might happen- before we’ve even started- we're doing the opposite. We’re tightening the ropes instead of lengthening them. We’re making the entrance to our coaching ministry narrower, more complicated, and harder to access.

The truth is that the more obstacles you set up for people to be able to work with you equal less people working with you.

More obstacles = Less clients

That's not helpful to anyone, right?

What you’re calling a “boundary” might actually be a barrier. Not for you—but for the very people you're called to help.

When you create a rule or a restriction around something you haven’t actually faced yet in your coaching or business, you’re unintentionally putting more weight on your potential clients.

They already have enough to overcome in life. They don’t need their coach to add another hurdle.

Your job isn’t to pre-filter everyone who might work with you- it’s to show up, trust the Holy Spirit, and adjust as you grow.

Boundaries should bless your practice, not block people from stepping into it.

Boundaries Should Be Built from Wisdom, Not Worry

Here’s the shift:

Healthy boundaries come from discernment, not defense.

Instead of asking, “How can I avoid being hurt?”

Ask, “What is God inviting me into—and what boundaries will help me steward that well?”

There’s a difference between walls that protect and walls that imprison.

You can’t pre-plan every challenge. And you don’t need to.God’s grace meets you in the process, not in your preemptive planning.

Let experience shape your boundaries—not fear.

Let Boundaries Grow With You

Start with values-based boundaries, not fear-based ones. What matters most to you in your coaching practice?

Build from there—and stay open to refining as you grow.

You’ll find that the real need for boundaries becomes clear once you’ve actually stepped into the work.

Reader Challenge

This week, take an inventory:

Where have you set up “protective” boundaries that were rooted in fear, not experience or calling?

Ask God to show you which of those walls can come down- and what He wants to build in their place. And hey- don’t be afraid to begin. You can’t grow what you never plant.

If this resonated with you, share this with a coach who’s just getting started. And if you’re loving this myth-busting series, would you leave a review or tag me on Instagram? I’d love to hear your story @coachlauramalone.

Until next time, don’t let fear shape your future. Build with freedom. Walk in grace.

And keep making decisions that move the needle you can make an impact and an income.